October 31, 2009

Here's the short story...I had a great day. If you're not interested in reading a long-ish blog post, stop here. Otherwise read on.

Today began pretty much like any other weekend day. My family and I slept in but no matter how late I sleep, I always wake up before anyone else. Today was a very late day for me. I didn't get out of bed until 12:30 PM and didn't leave my bedroom until well after 1:00 PM. As is my custom, I hit the ground running and immediately began working in the garden. The time has come to begin winterizing my garden and preparing for the oncoming cold weather. It really didn't matter to me what time it was or what needed doing, today I intended to do whatever I wanted, however I wanted. You see, today marked my 23rd wedding anniversary, an occasion which until quite recently I chose not to celebrate, preferring instead to focus on the traditions of Trick or Treat. This year, however, is a little different.

It seemed hypocritical to celebrate my wedding anniversary, an occasion that was a source of unhappiness, frustration and disappointment. As far as I was concerned I had nothing to celebrate. The details for this state of affairs are irrelevant now. All I will say is that I was living a miserable existence for a long time. It was the classic tale of "staying married for the sake of the children". Truth be told, I stayed married because I really didn't want to go through another bout of single motherhood as I had after my first marriage. It was stressful enough the first time around when I was a lot younger and stronger and only had one child to raise in those days. Staying with my husband was an exercise in sheer willpower and tolerance. Many of my friends don't know how I have been able to manage it and are surprised that I have been able to do so for this long. Even my children are surprised that we're still married. It is no secret that their father is demanding, unfair and exceedingly difficult to live with. They would have left themselves years ago if they had been able to.

So what has changed. In a word, me. I've changed. For some years now I have been on a journey of self-discovery, growth and development of my inner strengths and knowledge. I have become more attuned with the universal energies that influence everyday life and am learning how to move with the flow of that energy instead of against it. I'm not talking about religion; I don't do religion. I'm talking about wisdom and self-knowledge. Let me just say that knowing myself, my own power and my own potential have had a calming effect on me. This is not to say that I don't have my "screaming meanie" days. We all have those at some point. I'm saying that they are much fewer and far between. I'm now more likely to pass on an argument, choosing to be happy over being right. That alone is a major step for me. The payoff is that those around me seem less stressed and are less likely to fly off the handle. My family life will never be like "The Brady Bunch". It's more like "Roseanne" with a Latin twist. It's still a work in progress.

So what did I do on my anniversary? I raked the leaves in the backyard, cleaned the old kiddy wagon that I use as a makeshift wheelbarrow, polished it with ArmorAll and stored it in two heavy duty black plastic bags for the winter, then clipped some cut branches into smaller pieces for disposal. When my husband finally awoke and came downstairs, I wished him a happy anniversary, gave him a kiss and we had a little impromptu dance in the kitchen. I checked email, gave out Halloween candy to some cute trick-or-treaters and generally just did whatever I wanted, however I wanted, with no stress, no hurry, no expectations. Later in the evening, my husband took me to a fancy restaurant where we were treated like visiting royaly by a waitstaff that wished us a happy anniversary at every turn (even personalized our menus to read "Happy 23rd Anniversary" across the top!). We "danced" in our seats while we waited for our meal (which was delicious), smooched a little like a couple of school kids, and had some laughs. A complimentary anniversary photo was taken by one of the staff and we even got a free piece of key lime pie to take home as an anniversary gift. Not too shabby.

We got home in time for me to help my son with his Halloween make-up before he left for a party. My husband, having done his husbandly duty for our anniversary, promptly tended to his priority, to wit, sitting down to watch the World Series game. He had gone out in the afternoon and bought me a bottle of my favorite libation so I poured us a drink, we clinked to our health and had ourselves another little anniversary smooch while my daughter looked on.

Okay, so maybe my day wasn't all chocolate and roses, and maybe the earth didn't move the way it did 23 years ago. Just the fact that I'm sitting here at my keyboard telling you about it is a clear sign to me that it was a good day. Better than my husband and I have shared in a long, long time.

Yep, it was a very good day.

Ballo ergo sum,
- Gitana, the Creative Diva

Things, they are a-changing

Around my home, things don't seem to happen in a calm, easy manner. They happen in frenzied clusters of activity, one behind the other, followed by relative inactivity for months at a time. In my last two posts I mentioned the stair renovations that took place inside and outside my home. Well, those weren't the only changes around here. Since October began:

1) My son earned his bartending certificate on the last of three tries. Perseverence wins out.

2) He also passed his road test and is our family's newest driver. He's already developed the habit of asking for the keys and registration to the car. Unfortunately for him he hasn't been very successful in getting it.

3) Triple header: My son celebrates his 20th birthday this month. He is officially no longer a teenager.

4) I finally ended my years of procrastination and purchased a new printer that can better serve my graphic printing needs. You can go here to read some more on this.

5) I successfully completed a large custom invitation order and received a check with lots of zeroes after the number. You can read about this in my artist blog here.

6) The pine tree that has graced the front of my home for years is being removed. Unfortunately the roots have infiltrated and are clogging the sewer line from my house. We've had to have it snaked out three times in less than a year but it was on this last visit that the serviceman was able to reach the (literal) root of the problem. The choices were scrap the tree or prepare to replace the sewer line when the roots eventually cracked it clean through. The tree lost that coin toss.

7) The apple tree in the back of the house is also coming down. After years of lackluster apple production (with the notable exception of the 2007 season - 137 pounds of apples -- whew!) I've decided to bring the tree down. It is so large that it literally sucks the light out of the backyard. I can't get a decent vegetable to grow because the tree takes up all the light, water and nutrients. It's time to bring more light and warmth into my yard and my life so the apple tree goes.

With these two large trees gone, my home and gardens will be filled with light. This is a good thing. My gardens should flourish and my clothes should dry very quickly when I put them out on the line next summer. This is something to look forward to. Next year should be very interesting around here.

There is still a week left to the month of October. With all that has occurred so far this month, I can't wait to see what this last week has in store for me.


Ballo ergo sum,
- Gitana, the Creative Diva

The Renovation Continues

Now that the exterior entry steps and foyer have been renovated, attention is focused on the interior stairs. The stairs leading to my basement workshoop and laundry room were squeaky and really ugly due to layers of paint and who-knows-what that had accumulated with previous owners. There were gaps between the treads and risers that allowed dirt to fall through into the room below. All these steps were removed and replaced. Unfortunately my camera was down in the basement and I was trapped on the upper floor unable to retrieve it during the construction process so the only photo I was able to take was after it was all done (aoove right). Next order of business...the main run of stairs leading to the upper bedrooms.

The main stairway was the focus of my attention last year when I set about to stripping them of no less than four layers of paint. My intention was to expose the original wood grain and varnish them. What I discovered was that those multiple layers of paint were not only hiding dangerous cracks but the house had settled so much that the treads no longer fit properly into the risers, allowing them to shift. Essentially all that old paint was holding the stairs together. When I stripped it off, the real deterioration began. One tread had actually cracked completely from end to end and was being held in place by a couple of mending strips and a few screws in an attempt to prevent someone falling right through the stairs. Most of the treads and risers in this run of steps had to be replaced. As with most renovation projects it was noisy and messy but it was finally completed.

It took four days to complete the entire series of stairs, interior and exterior, in my home. I wonder how long its going to take me to clean up and put everything back in place.

Ballo ergo sum,
- Gitana, the Creative Diva

Fixer Upper

Every year we try to renovate something in the house. It might be a large project like last year's new fence and new garden shed, or it could be something as simple as rescreening the windows. This year we're tackling a number of projects, all of which have to do with the major thoroughfares within our home: the stairways. The brick entry stairs that lead to my front door were old and showing their age. The many cracks and openings in the mortar had allowed ants and termites to enter our house over the years, not to mention it was a shabby entry to our home. Those steps were removed and replaced yesterday with new brick steps and limestone treads.

Today the tiny foyer between the front door and the living room was given a new floor. The floor that was there when we bought the house 19 years ago was old, dark and cracking around the edges. As long as the brickwork on the front steps was being done, we decided to have the foyer tiled at the same time. We already had the materials and only needed the labor. Having a mason already onsite greatly simplified that. When he removed the old top layer he found that the underneath layer was of ceramic tile. It had been given a coat of black tar-like adhesive and tiled over with regular floor tiles. Those floor tiles were removed and new marble tiles were placed right over the old ceramic ones. These tiles have the irregularities of the mother marble in them (in other words they are not polished), giving them a rustic, aged character.

The next order of business is the main stairway to the upper story of our home. These stairs have settled, cracked and have threatened to give way under our feet for far too long and repair is mandatory. The smaller stairway that leads to the basement has also seen better days and is scheduled for repair.

The original renovation contract stipulated that all the work (brickwork, tile work and carpentry) was to have been completed over two calendar days but the materials vendor for the wood to be used on the stairs was unable to deliver in time. Bottom line: my two day schedule is now a four day schedule that includes this Saturday and Sunday. This complicates matters somewhat because the entire family will be home all day as opposed to being out at school or work, so there will be a lot more in the way of inconvenience happening this weekend. No matter. In a few days it will be over and things will settle back to normal, whatever that is in this household.

Here are a few pictures of the work done on the front steps and the interior foyer. With the number of repairs needed in this old house I feel these repairs are like placing a bandage on a bullet wound but I'll take my blessings wherever and whenever they come.

Ballo ergo sum,
- Gitana, the Creative Diva